Previously on American Horror Story: Asylum: “The Name Game“.
“Spilt Milk” begins in present time, with Dylan McDermott’s Bloody Face Jr. in a seedy motel room, getting high and waiting for a prostitute; when the prostitute arrives, she and Junior share a disgusting conversation about the fact that she is a new mother, and he has hired her to let him suck milk out of her titties. I’m just going to leave that right where it is. FX and this show continuously get right on the edge of what some would consider “inappropriate for television”. I’m fine with it because censorship is fucking clown shoes.
Whoooooosh, back to 1964: away from the uncomfortableness of adult breastfeeding
After we learn Grace has named her baby Thomas, we get a disturbing few comments out of Bloody Face Sr., Dr. Thredson, about Grace’s “milk production”. Coming from anyone else, it probably wouldn’t have been creepy. Then Grace relays her memory of the aliens having “put our baby inside me”, which is probably the most painful description of impregnation you can hear. Grace goes on to tell Kit about how the aliens planned to impregnate Kit’s wife, Alma, which is why they took her; they made a mistake, though, which cost Alma her life, and that’s why she didn’t come back. Grace and Kit decide they are to get married. They are interrupted by Monsignor Timothy and a group of bitchass nuns barging in and taking the baby. Apparently they don’t think living in an insane asylum is the best way for a baby to be raised.
Last week, as Judy Martin/Sister Jude drifted in and out of clarity (after experiencing a large amount of electroshock therapy), she told Mother Claudia, another nun, about Lana and the fact that she isn’t supposed to be in Briarcliff. This week, Mother Claudia is making good on her promise to get Lana out; she approaches Lana and tells her she wants to see Briarcliff “pulled down”, so she will help her escape. What follows is a great scene where Lana walks slower than Bella Swan across a high school parking lot; she’s trying to sneak her way around Dr. Thredson, who is having a conversation with Kit about striking a deal. Dr. Thredson wants Kit to convince Lana to give him Dr. Thredson’s taped confession, in exchange for Thredson helping Kit get Grace’s baby back. This scene is verging on the exposition vomit levels of Prometheus, as we also manage to learn Dr. Thredson plans to now blame his murders on Dr. Arden, who has gone missing Remember, Dr. Arden sets himself on fiyah, last week. After ALL of that, Lana finally makes it out the front door, again, and has escaped Briarcliff, again. The scene is “great” for one reason and one reason only: at the end, Dr. Thredson comes out of the asylum as Lana is pulling away in a taxi; she presses the tape against the window and flips Thredson off.
Now that Lana is out of the asylum, where does she go? Back to Dr. Thredson’s house, of course! She says she gave the tape to the police first, which is a good move, at least. Thredson walks into his home, and Lana is there waiting with a gun pointed at him. True to form, Dr. Thredson keeps completely calm… you know, because he’s a psychopath. A conversation ensues between Lana and Thredson where, among other things, we learn that Thredson had difficulty “practicing” with Wendy’s dead body. If you don’t recall, Wendy is Lana’s girlfriend whom Dr. Thredson killed earlier in the season. By “practice” he means he was having sex with her dead body. How do I know this? Well, because we see it. There goes the show walking that line again. This is interspersed with flashes to Bloody Face Jr. and that hooker in the present time. The way the show juxtaposes the interaction between Lana and Thredson with that of Bloody Face Jr. and the prostitute is excellent. Eventually, Bloody Face Jr. attacks the prostitute, and Lana shoots Dr. Thredson, after he has told Lana that he disposed of Wendy by cutting her into pieces and spreading her into many places (sorry if that’s too graphic, but “graphic” is kind of this show’s M.O.). He also told Lana he expected to live out the rest of his life in prison or an insane asylum because he was “clearly insane”. That’s when she killed him: “Jail is too good for you”, she said.
We then jump ahead to Lana and some friends at Wendy’s tomb where the friends lament the fact that “they” weren’t able to find any part of Wendy’s remains. The friends also blame “that nun” for everything; they’re referring to Sister Jude, but Lana blames herself. More to the point, she blames “the story”; she would do anything to get the story she wanted, which was to “expose” Briarcliff. This is the point in the show where we shame these journalists like Lana Winters who go as far as they must to get their story; too far.
Meanwhile, Judy Martin is still in the asylum bringing the ruckus. She’s finally coming back to her senses after that electroshock; she tells the patients to stop taking their medicine because it “turns your brain to mush”. She also confronts Monsignor Timothy about his “naked ambition” which is just as much to blame for everything as anything else. It seems Judy is intent on getting more electroshock therapy.
As a result of Dr. Thredson’s confession/death, Kit is being released from Briarcliff. Following this, he sits down for a heart-to-heart with the monsignor. This is when Kit suddenly turns into some kind of criminal mastermind who somehow managed to work out that he has Monsignor Timothy by the balls; he also put together that Grace is technically “dead” as far as anyone outside of Briarcliff is concerned. After she died, Dr. Arden filled out her death certificate and everything. That means, all Kit needs is for Monsignor Timothy to release her body to him, which he promptly does. Kit never seemed this smart before he had to be. Both Kit and Grace are released from Briarcliff, Kit takes Grace to the house he still somehow owns, and they’re going to live happily ever after.
Holy fuck snot! Alma is there, and she has a baby. Of course! There are two more episodes left, after all, and we can’t have every plot line sewn up just yet.
A final, frenzied sequence of events begins with Lana in some backroom, illegal abortion clinic (sign of the times) where she’s about to, well, make use of the clinic. Just before the procedure begins, we see a montage of some of the most bloody scenes of the season; Lana suddenly stops the woman who was about to ram something inside of her and says she doesn’t want any more death. Smash cut to Lana speaking with two police officers about rampant corruption at Briarcliff (and the fact that, for all her troubles, Mother Claudia was transferred to Puerto Rico); while speaking with them, you can’t help but notice she’s smoking while very much pregnant (also a sign of the times). She convinces the police to obtain a court order which will allow her access into Briarcliff where she can speak with Judy. Another smash cut to Monsignor Timothy’s office where the Lana and the police come busting in demanding to see Judy. Unfortunately, the monsignor says, Judy hanged herself. Well, I guess that’s that.
That’s not that, of course! Judy is very much alive; they’ve just got her in a basement dungeon/death pit. This is a pattern: Monsignor Timothy can’t come up with any of his own ideas; he took Kit’s scheme and applied it to Judy, complete with fake death certificate. Way to go, Kit!
Now we zoom into the future, but it’s not years; it’s months. Lana has just given birth to Bloody Face Jr. and had planned to never see him; opting instead to immediately put him up for adoption. For some reason, though, this nurse decides it’s okay for her to bring the baby in to see Lana because he’s allergic to formula and won’t stop crying. That’s a shitty move, random nurse. Clearly feeling a connection to the baby, Lana takes him and breastfeeds him, which ties in to the beginning of the episode… except it’s approximately 9000 times less creepy.