Previously on Jane the Virgin, “Chapter Fifty-Six”
After killing off the only two speaking white male characters, Jane takes ownership of its rampant sexism and overt female gaze while showing us the darker side of sisterhood. I see you, writers.
The Southern: Mateo’s teacher (hey, Molly from Insecure). She’s all smiles and sweetness to your face, but sneers and snide the moment you turn your back. Trust your instincts with this one. Don’t trust your gorgeous ex-boyfriend’s.
Kryptonite: Find out her dirty secrets and keep then keep them to yourself. And make sure she knows.
The Brewer: Mateo’s ex-aide. She watches and listens and then she spills. You may think she’s your best ally with her verbal generosity, but rest assured she’s having a tea party with everyone and your leaves are in the mix.
Kryptonite: Put the cup down.
The Bitch: Petra. She blatant and in your face, but at least you know where you stand. She may laugh about your crappy mothering skills or disparage your entire gender to your barely-there girlfriend when you’re not around, but that’s your own fault for leaving the room. She’s really can’t help herself.
Kryptonite: Be too distracted by some nefarious, unknown scheme to pay attention to her glee.
The Shank: Abby. This one is so innocuous as to be forgettable. In fact, you forget about her for about a year until her yipping gets too annoying to ignore. It’s when you try to get rid of her that she strikes. Deep stab to the stomach with the slam book you’re trying to hide.
Kryptonite: Unknown. You only have yourself to blame.
The Judge: Jane.
The Bro: The editor (why bother learning the name of this new white man). Sure, he’s a bro but bros are people, too. He may have a thing or two to teach Jane if she can look past his sex (and if the writers forgive him his race).
The Hapless: Bruce. He came out of the blue and we forgot about him. But unlike Abby, he was redeemed. Doing dishes in the kitchen. Comforting and counseling Xiomara. Mediating an agreement with his girlfriend and her ex. Wrangling her students into a proposal scene. Bruce won’t stay, but we’ll love to see him go. #datass
The Beautiful: Rafael. Bearded, Mustachioed. Confused. Scheming. It doesn’t matter. He is forgiven everything.
The Babe (as in Baby): Mateo. Once again, he shows he checks his mother and gives her insight. He may be a little two dimensional, but he’s the son of The Beautiful. And four.
Rane – Let’s talk about it. Jane struggles to write about her relationship with Rafael until Alba gives her some wise advice. Loving Rafael let her love Michael more. Will loving Michael now lead Jane back to Rafael? Duh. Sigh.
Puck – Chuck is sensitive. Surprise! Petra has a conscience. Surprise! Petra told the truth. Surprise! Chuck walked away. No surprise. Drunk Petra was the best.
Xogelio – Poor Bruce.
Old Timey Wall Breaking: This was an amusing use of the novel writing motif. I agree, Xo. It is gross.
Grammar check: Rafael writes “Lets do it” on the card and goes back to add the apostrophe. It is “Let’s”. He can learn.
Jane the Virgin S3E13
This episode was all over the place, but it kept me entertained with the tongue-in-cheekiness of the writers.