Previously on Pretty Little Liars, ‘Songs of Innocence’
Last week, the Liars lied, did not at all cope with what is probably the most traumatic experience they’ve had to date, and Mona was nowhere to be found (and nobody seemed to even notice). There was very little forward movement with the story so I’m hoping this week’s episode will knock me off my seat. Let’s begin.
Emily and Spencer (who is crouched next to the kitchen island, as though if she isn’t seen, she might not be heard) are chatting via cell phone about Sarah. Aria is on her phone talking tto Hanna and declares that their captor has to be Andrew (because she already swore that under oath and all) and Hanna dismissively agrees, but is more concerned about not going to school alone that day. (She’s looking particularly fierce for someone who was just rescued from a torture chamber).
Sarah emerges from what is one of her multiple showers and asks to stick around for a while. Emily leaves her a burner (You know, something all teenage girls keep in their desk drawers. You never know when you’ll need an untraceable cell phone.) and then Sarah loses her marbles when Emily tries to touch her shoulder. Emily opts to skip school to make French toast with Sarah. Which, of course, is the universal cure for PTSD.
At the coffee shop, Ezra offers up his office to Aria to hide out in while she skips school because she doesn’t want to hide out at home. Considering she just went missing, I think being unaccounted for is a bad idea, but that’s really Aria’s forte, so it’s not surprising.
Spencer berates Ali into forcing her father to fess up about Charles. Okay, for real, what time does school start? These girls have all sorts of time to get dolled up and chit chat around town before first period. Anyway, Ali kicks her out and tells Spencer to stay away from Jason. But Spencer is an entitled tyrant and will do as she pleases anyway.
The only one who shows up at school is Hanna and she instantly bumps into the therapist Dr. Sullivan. She asks Hanna to stop by some time and I’m still unclear why this isn’t required of the girls. After all they’ve been through, how are they not on court mandated daily therapy? Hanna has a brief chat with the doc and says she will make a group session at the doc’s office happen.
Ezra and Aria try to call the police department to obtain some personal information on Andrew Campbell. They pose as a doctor needing medical information. Yeah, okay, because that’s how it works. Of course, they get nowhere, but are stunned to find out that Andrew was adopted. Dun, dun, dun. In reality, they wouldn’t have even gotten that information, but even with it, I’m not sure what the excitement is. I guess these folks just love a mystery.
Detective Handsome convinces Ali to volunteer for a girls soccer program while Toby watches their flirting from a coffee shop window. This is the smallest town on the entire planet because nothing happens at any point in time without someone else bearing witness. Except crimes, of course.
Emily and her mom offer Sarah up some of Emily’s old clothes on account of Sarah’s mom getting rid of her stuff to “make space.” Ouch. No wonder the girl ran away. She says she “couldn’t do it anymore.” But she was home for like five hours, so she didn’t really try all that hard. And fleeing to Rosewood to escape drama was probably the worst idea ever. But she’ll see.
Toby asks Spencer to convince Ali to stay away from Detective Handsome. Considering the animosity between these two and how bossy Spencer already is, I don’t think this will have the desired effect. It will just chase Ali closer to him. You’d think a detective would understand that, but since Toby only spent one semester in the police academy, I’m sure he just missed that class.
Hanna tries to whisk Emily away to a therapy session but she isn’t budging. Aria comes flying down the street (where did she get this car? Earlier she was going to walk to school, now she’s got some sweet wheels) to proclaim that Andrew was adopted and therefore must be Charles DeLaurentis. I mean… obviously.
Just as she was asked not to, Spencer goes to talk to Jason. It takes him a few minutes to connect that a “Charlie” may be connected to “Charles” but then cryptically says he doesn’t exist. My prediction is that Charlie was Jason’s twin brother and they later convinced him Charlie was his imaginary friend. If I turn out to be right, I’m sending this recap to ABC Family and expect to be on the writing staff stat.
After a commercial break, I discover that I am EXACTLY RIGHT. *does happy dance* But the girls aren’t buying it. As they chat about this imaginary friend, Emily gets a “face chat” from Sarah before the therapy session. Only Sarah is asleep on a bed and a gloved hand flips open a knife. The screen flashes to a warning that if they don’t leave in 30 seconds, “someone will die.” The screen then starts a countdown. A has some seriously wicked technology. And the girls stare at the countdown for a ridiculously long time without moving a muscle.
When the doc comes out, the girls are long gone. When they get to Emily’s house, they find Sarah’s bed empty. But not to worry, she was just taking another shower. When Mama Fields comes home, she divulges that Andrew is being released and hasn’t been charged because they have no case against him. Didn’t Aria testify that she saw him? Isn’t an eyewitness to a crime at least something of a case? I didn’t go to law school, but something ain’t adding up here. Then again, it’s Rosewood, so…
The girls search the DiLaurentis house for some trace of Charles / Charlie. Spencer and Ali dig up some flowers (because I’m always hiding proof of my secret children in the garden) and they chat about Lorenzo. She says it’s “pointless” being with him (not to mention illegal) but looks sort of pitiful so Spencer doesn’t convince her to stay away from him like Toby had asked her to.
It’s Aria who hit the jackpot – a folded up picture of the original DeLaurentis family, hidden inside a jar of buttons. I’m not sure why they didn’t check there first. Isn’t that the most logical place to keep it? She says that’s where she used to hide her “candy money” from her little brother. Okay, why does everyone have a button jar? Alison tells the girls to leave because her dad will be home soon. She’ll find out what it means and let them all know. Yeah, I bet.
The girls walk down the street (now where is Aria’s car? Or Hanna’s? Are they trying to win a FitBit step challenge? Why are they always just strolling around town?) and happen to see Andrew being released. Their timing is ridiculously impeccable. And he’s miraculously alone. Aria strides right over to him and he wants nothing to do with her. Apparently he’d been searching for Aria the entire three weeks they’d been gone and the thanks he got for it was being arrested and investigated. Uh, okay. Since when did he become Magnum P.I. and think it was logical to just disappear for three weeks to search for his sort of not really girlfriend? Did he not think that would be suspicious or dangerous or just plain weird? Where do these kids get the money for all their escapades? He tosses some seriously angry words in their faces and saunters off. On foot. Because Rosewood does not have cars. After Spencer pointedly introduces them all to Lorenzo as “Alison’s friends”, they finally start to open up about what Charlie / Charles did to them in the dollhouse. But there is so much left to discuss. Like seriously, WHERE THE HELL IS MONA?
When Emily gets home, she finds that Sarah has given herself a Miley Cyrus makeover. It’s the most frightening moment of the episode. At Spencer’s house, her mom is doubtful and demanding and pretends to be a concerned parent (and pretends to not be Mariska Hargitay – are these two related? The resemblance is uncanny!). Hanna inspects some paint swatches for her room and Aria takes pictures of herself in a mirror. At Ali’s house, dad breaks it down to Ali and Jason just who the boy in the photo is. We don’t get to hear any of it, but we all know what he’s saying. It’s Charlie / Charles, of course.
Overall, a truly solid episode. I like the new twists and turns and even like this creepy weirdo Sarah who has weaseled herself into the Fields’ home. I love that we progressed the story while still maintaining a huge air of mystery. What PLL is really best at. But if they don’t show me where in the heck Mona is next week, I’m going to riot.