Previously on Sons of Anarchy, ‘Smoke ’em If You Got ’em’
Jax hands Juice his cut where JT was killed. “I’m sorry,” Juice says simply. Jax only gives him the eyebrows and Chibs turns his back on him. Juice heads down the road and fires near some highway patrolmen, throwing his gun down, initiating a chase into a blockade. Under the eye of the Rat Boy and Montez, he takes his sweet time complying but eventually puts his hands behind his head as the patrolmen arrest him.
His mission in jail, according to a table meeting: get into the general population, kill Lin, and then get killed by Tully’s guys. I’m not sure he knew that last part verbatim, but when he ends up in a cell far away from gen pop with an Aryan, I think he gets the picture. I feel pretty robbed of the conversation between Juice and the Sons that precipitated all of this. That better be a flashback, SUTTER!
A Mother & Son Problem
At the table, Jax outlines the next step—planting the pastor’s body at August’s development to tarnish his political pull—lamenting “having” to use August to finish off Lin, which makes no sense because that was literally his entire plan. He closes with an emotional speech about brotherhood. “You are my family. I love all of you.” Sociopathy just oozes off of Happy during emotional moments.
Jax warns Loutreesha and Grant that Marks is only getting started moving in on their church land. In exchange for her signing an affidavit that Marks bullied them into selling their property, they promise to take care of a pimp named Greensleeves who’s blackmailing them with more sex footage of the pastor (boy, that guy got around) and have Gemma help Loutreesha detox at the cabin. Interesting choice revealing this so we’re aware the whole time.
I really wish Greensleeves hadn’t been an actual person—the lyrics are appropriate enough. But anyway, Nero knows the pimp, IDing him, but wants 10 minutes with Jax afterwards. The pimp is of course a real prize, abusing his top escort Winsome. Chibs punches him straight in the gut, making the girls jump them and the pimp take off in his Hummer, running over Chibs’ bike and narrowly missing Nero. But the guys recruit Winsome to Diosa in exchange for the pimp’s address. He’s abusing yet another poor girl, so Chibs shoots him and Jax shoves him halfway through the window, leaving him impaled like Tony Goldwyn in Ghost. Chibs chastises, “THAT was a very sloppy suicide.” Jax is like, “Yeah?” Hee.
With Winsome safely tucked in his car, Nero talks to Jax about buying him out of Diosa. He should’ve left already, you know? We all agree, Nero. Take your sweaters and run. Jax of course swears it’s all gonna calm down, but nobody is buying that. “Are you a gangster?” Winsome asks. “I don’t think so,” Nero says. He really isn’t.
Meanwhile Quinn, Tig, and Bobby break into construction site to plant the preacher’s body and take a photo. Then the guys give Loutreesha’s statement to Tyler for August with a message to meet them later at the park. Tyler hopes August won’t kill the messenger since Jax won’t break off the Niners just yet, but that’s probably exactly what happened. Either that or Tyler’s been in with August this whole time, and that would be super interesting, because he acts like a dolt.
Gemma, Wendy, & Wayne
Wendy tries telling Gemma that Abel seems more distant every day, so of course Gemma blows it off to talk about their Juice problem. “This Juice Shit is on me,” she says. That doesn’t sound right. “If you want to split you should.” DO IT, WENDY! But no.
Unser spends the whole episode dropping tidbits and observing. First tidbit: he tells Jax that Eglee, a former classmate of Jax’s and dyed in the wool Charmite, won’t say boo as long as she’s protected. Second tidbit: after Chapel, he reports to the guys that Juice was arrested, 100% not buying them playing dumb. He does the same to Gemma, who starts hyperventilating about what Juice might’ve said to whom, then says he’ll move his trailer soon. She grabs him, crying that she doesn’t want anyone else to leave her. His face…
Chucky sweetly offers Gemma a listening ear, but Big Daddy Nero pulls up with the Sweater back in full swing, so she kisses the adoring Chucky on the forehead. Nero wants to retire, again, for rill this time. He’s not vital on the street anymore, so he’s buying his uncle’s ranch and wants her to come too. She of course can’t see the perfect opportunity to take the boys to the country. “There’s too much Shit going on,” she protests. Both teary and sniffling, he says, “We deserve something better, Gemma” “Do we?” she wonders. Jimmy Smits is hands down the best crier on TV. No joke. They need an MTV award for that.
So Jax tells Happy and Rat Boy to get Gemma to the cabin. Their discomfort is hilariously palpable. Jax stupidly says she doesn’t need details, and Happy and Rat side eye the shit out of him. You know, when Happy can see you’re lacking in emotional intelligence, you should be concerned.
When Happy and Rat try to collect her, oozing fear and zero info, Gemma’s alarm klaxons practically start ringing audibly. Unser sees her walk out, looking like she’s going to her own execution. Naturally when they stop by the house for her “stuff”, she goes straight for the gun tote/hatbox. Abel zombie walks in the house right past Rat and Happy, Wendy telling Brooke he got in a fight with a first grader. As per usual, nobody gives a crap where he goes in the house, which is to see Gemma squeezing Thomas, sobbing and confessing, as though babies aren’t scarred by extreme emotional stress, “Killing your mommy was an accident. I didn’t want it. I loved your mommy so much. I’m so sorry.” Yeah.
Wendy is confused by Gemma’s tears, reassuring Gemma that he won’t hurt her for simply hiding Juice, but Gemma, who is obviously hiding more than that, has her summon Nero to the cabin. Just as Nero’s giving Alvarez his Gang Retirement notice and makes him the same Diosa offer, he gets the call and runs out. The man cannot get a break. Unser gets that call too, but the guys think it’s just Happy’s sparkling personality, so Bobby offers to check on The Moms. There’s a great moment of Unser shrugging off Tig patting him.
Up at the cabin, the Montez, Rat, and Happy still say absolutely nothing explanatory except “in the bedroom” so Gemma loads her gun in the kitchen. Finally she walks as slowwwwly as possible and sees… “The mother and son, the family problem. That’s why you’re here.” She looks positively ill yet relieved. Those guys have no idea how close they came to dying. Then Nero pounds on the door, but she smoothly covers like she needs a fellow junkie. They hug, intensely relieved.
At the end of the day, “Greensleeves” plays on the boys’ music box as Wendy checks on them. As usual, I wonder how these kids ever sleep with the damned light on and people touching them constantly, but, hey, Abel isn’t asleep at all. Abel is plotting. Because he is a scary killer preschooler.
Final Suttertage: Greensleeves. The Sons and Mayans head to their meet. Bobby, on the other hand, sings and smokes his way up to the cabin… until a black van and an expensive car run him off the road. Eight well-dressed men from August’s crew swarm out to his wrecked car and wrecked hand. Oh, Bobby. That ain’t right.
Marks lets the Sons & Mayans seethe for an hour at the park before sending his replacement BAMF Suit, Moses Cartright, and a box containing “his reply.” Taking a page from August’s smoothly polite ice-cold killer school, Moses observes, “I really admire your level of camaraderie. I can see how brotherhood is important to all of you. You guys have a good evening.”
WHAT’S IN THE BOHHHX?! A layer cake of horror: Bobby’s patches, iPad with a recording of them carving out his eyeball, and said eyeball in a Tupperware container. Yeah, no thanks on the leftovers, I’ll just make myself some cereal.
Next time: Bobby’s still alive for now; Jury is back for some harsh truthiness, and Unser is pretty damn sure Juice knows who killed Tara.