Let’s get one thing out of the way right now: Every time they said Lord Baltimore, I heard “Lord Voldemort.”
Red Makes It Rain
The second season premiere started in Cameroon with Red behaving in typical Red fashion: laughing in the face of danger a
gun barrel as he accuses an African crime lord, Yibari, of working for Berlin. Yibari says he doesn’t know what Red is talking about, but quickly gives up info when Red somehow manages to rain hellfire down on Yibari’s camp. He admits that Berlin has recently paid for the services of a man who goes by Lord Baltimore. Then Red burns $3 million in cash that he set on a table, simply because he can.
It’s Jane From Breaking Bad!
Liz is living from one hotel room to the next, setting up a Beautiful Mind room on the ceiling above her bed so she can obsess over the events of season one. Red tells her about Lord Baltimore and she heads into the FBI offices, which are now being run by someone else while Cooper recuperates, with the info. We learn that LB is a super-hacker, a myth, a legend. But they suspect that this LB may have tried to access the system of an FBI tech agent so she’s their only possible lead. Turns out it’s Jane from Breaking Bad! She has no idea who Lord Baltimore is, but later gets a threatening phone call warning her from talking to the feds again.
Berlin is all pissed off because one of his men, Marcus, reports that they’ll soon have Red and he wanted that shit done yesterday. Then Liz and Ressler question Jane from Breaking Bad (her character’s name is Rowan) in a place they suspect is one of Lord Baltimore’s hideouts. There are pics of her on the wall and they accuse her of being LB. She says that it’s most likely her evil twin who no one has seen in ages. Something is super fishy though because Marcus is standing outside when they lead Jane into the building and the two definitely share “a look.”
The episode takes an interesting detour when Red is kidnapped by a group of Israeli operatives who blame Red for a situation in which a bunch of Israeli agents were killed. Red talks his way out of it and they release him back to the FBI. Just in time for Aram to reveal that LB is looking for a woman, not Red. Red looks at the list of possible victims-to-be and recognizes his ex-wife from the list.
It’s Nancy Botwin From Weeds!
Red’s ex is enjoying a very cozy White People’s Afternoon where three couples just lounge around in the middle of the day drinking wine. The FBI storms in and tell her she needs to come with them. Her poor husband, Beecher from Oz, doesn’t know what the hell is going on. Then, PLOT TWIST: Marcus barges into Jane’s apartment and plays a jazz album which triggers her to turn into her twin sister Nora. Split personality!! She gets all geared up and snipes out two FBI agents outside of Red’s ex’s house. Then a group of guys, including Marcus, storm in and shoot/taze folks so they can grab Red’s ex. Liz comes to just in time to tackle Jane in the street.
Under interrogation (and while Ressler investigates Jane’s mom’s house) they learn that she killed her twin sister (she was being molested and had a mental break, killing her sister for not being the one hurt) and has been operating as both for years. Why it was necessary to keep her sister’s corpse in a freezer in the back of a van behind her mama’s house is beyond me.
Payback is a Bitch
Now that Berlin has Red’s ex, he takes a picture of her and leaves it in the locket he carried in last season’s finale. He leaves the locket for Red to find after they abandon the safehouse where they were holed up. Later, Red gets a package from Berlin with a promise that he will mail pieces of his wife to him just as Red mailed pieces of his daughter to Berlin. Oh, and there’s a finger.
Now that Liz’s marriage to Tom is annulled she celebrates her new lease on life with a sassy haircut. And Cooper wasn’t going back to work, but after a visit from Red in which Red threatens him with something Cooper did in Kuwait (and also some mystery diagnosis that implies Cooper may not be long for this world), Cooper heads up the team again which makes everyone happy. Oh, and Ressler may have a budding pill addiction.
- Was that Tom watching Liz as she contemplated her new hair?
- Am I the only one not really invested in Red’s ex? Hopefully this gets tied up quickly.
- What the hell is Red holding over Cooper?
- What’s up with the Israeli kidnapping?