Previously on The Walking Dead, ‘Crossed’
Officer Bob 2.0 is trying to cut his zip ties on the front of a police car, but has to make a run for it when walkers show up. Rick is hot on his ass, too. Rick hops in the car and chases him, warning him to stop, but Bob 2.0 doesn’t listen. So, Bob 2.0 gets an ass full of fender and a broken back. Rick tells him it didn’t have to go down that way before putting a bullet in Bob’s head.
Gabriel hobbles his way to the school where Gareth and the other Termites cooked Bob’s leg. He just had to see for himself what they were capable of, I guess. He picks through the Termite’s belongings and finds Mary’s bible. Then he has a meltdown over Bob’s maggot filled appendage, but doesn’t get to wallow in his pity party for too long before the walkers in the school break free.
Gabriel stanky legs it back to the church, leading a mini-herd to the front door. He’s begging to be let in, basically yelling that he’s now a believer. “Shit is real! I understand now!” Armed with one of the spikes, he just screams and screams until Michonne busts open the door. If he couldn’t handle those walkers kept at bay then he deserves to die.
With Judith on her back, Michonne takes out a few of the walkers let in with Gabriel, but they soon have to run for it. Gabriel holds the door while Michonne and Carl escape through the underground railroad. Then they trap the walkers inside the church since they can’t leave the one spot Team Rick knows to look for them.
More Pew Pew, Less Talky Talk
Now Rick has to go back to the team and tell them how Bob 2.0 needed killing. The other officers are suddenly down for whatever. They’ll tell Dawn that Bob 2.0 was killed by rotters and still try to go through with the trade.
Meanwhile, Dawn is working on her fitness, again, riding the bike while Beth is New Noah, darning her socks and shit. Dawn is a little concerned that Bob 2.0 and them ain’t returning her calls, but not so concerned that she stops working out and then tries to engage in a little heart-to-heart with Beth. She confesses to killing the cop who used to be in charge, her mentor. The purpose of this story is to show Dawn gives zero fucks. Noted.
At the church, Gabriel tells Michonne and Carl that he went to the school because he had to see. He had to know. Yeah, just what I said a few paragraphs ago and it was stupid then and it’s stupid now. The walkers start to bust through the door, but it’s Abraham to the rescue! He parks that firetruck against the door just in the nick of time.
Then Glenn has to tell Michonne that Eugene was a lying liar who lies, and Michonne’s No Fucking Shit face is every.damn.thing. Michonne tells Maggie that Beth is alive at a hospital in Atlanta and Maggie is all, “Who?”
At the hospital, Officer O’Donnell (the one who wanted to take Carol off life support) is bullying Kris Kringle in the hallway and Dawn scoops up Beth because she needs her help with something.
Turns out, the only thing Beth was needed for was a little girl talk by the elevator shaft. Beth basically tells Dawn she’s full of shit, and Dawn tries the whole, “You owe me” bullshit. She says she knows that Beth killed Officer Rapey because of the smashed jar in her office. How that proves a damn thing is beyond me, but it doesn’t matter because Officer McDonnell shows up and decides now is the time to stage a coup d’tat.
They fight and now I see why Dawn is always on that bike. Beth tries to help, but gets slammed to the ground as Officer Dickhead warns her to “stay in your lane, bitch.” Dawn throat chops him and then Beth pushes him down the elevator shaft and yells, “This is my lane, bitch!”
I’m kidding. She didn’t say that.
Beth starts talking all kinds of shit like her situation changed and I missed it. She tells Dawn she knows she just used her like everyone uses everyone else at the hospital. And she’s blowing this joint as soon as she can. Dawn, once again, tries to appeal to Beth by telling her she knows her and Carol are friends and that they should join them to be a part of something bigger. Ugh. This is so bad.
Really Shitty Brotherly Advice by Tyreese
Tyreese and Sasha are on sniper duty on the roof when he admits to Sasha that he had White Glenn and could have killed him, but didn’t, and then lied about it. Tyreese thinks they both failed to do what needed to be done because they’re still the people they were before. She’s like, “Maybe you are different… and that’s cool… but… oh, hush. I gotta take this shot.”
Rick meets with two officers who come out looking for the officers they have taken hostage. He lays out their terms: Carol and Beth for their officers. Just in case there’s any mistaking that Rick came to fuck around, Sasha snipes out a walker behind the officers. Rick will wait for them to radio their proposal to Dawn.
Carol wakes up in just enough time to go home. And the exchange goes fairly well until Dawn decides she wants Noah back. Wait. What now? Why? This makes no fucking sense. Is Dawn that unreasonable? Power hungry? Just gotta have a win, does she?
Because Noah isn’t a complete asshole, he decides to stay even though Rick and Daryl are telling him he doesn’t have to. While Beth hugs Noah goodbye, Dawn whispers she knew he’d be back. This causes Beth to stab Dawn in the chest with some sewing scissors she swiped. Dawn’s gun accidentally goes off and shoots Beth in the head.
I would have lit that hallway up, but I’m petty as fuck so…
I have to settle for Daryl putting a bullet in Dawn’s forehead as she swears it was just an accident. Officer Shepherd talks everyone into putting down their weapons and then offers Team Rick sanctuary at the hospital. Is she stupid? Rick basically tells her to go pound some fucking sand, and says they’ll also take anyone else who wants to go with them because fuck you, that’s why.
And NO ONE else decides to go! We see this as Team Firetruck rolls up just as Team Rick is exiting the hospital and the only new addition to the group is Noah. Daryl carries out Beth’s body as Maggie falls to her knees and says, “Oh, THAT Beth.”
I’m going to save my in depth review of this episode – including my thoughts on that Morgan scene – for tomorrow night’s podcast. Make sure you get your feedback in on our Facebook page or below and we’ll read it on the air.